Absence

Absent charm, distrustful grin
ghosts of the past,
stil haunt this house,
forsaken place
damned you 525 times

Want to go away
to the Pacific Northwest
find a better air
to feel small
to remember you in the trees,
your sweet smile,
your warm hand on my arm
your tight grip again,
because it seems like fading away
again.

Can't help myself,
get stuck in the head,
stupid child
that wants to get out
and can't seem
to be put away
in the past

Love the smell of the trees,
always have,
love your cold body at night
love your soft skin
love your sweet inner child
ghosts also haunt your mind

No friends here,
no sincerity,
no honesty,
no transparency,
only fake smiles.

Except yours
it always shines
it always sings
and I can't hide
this enormous mountain
inside my heart
despite all the faults
the slips
the absence
the lack of you
this lava inside
still melts for you
for that image
that can't seem to disguise
and it trembles deep inside
angst...